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Thread: News Flash!

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    S. E. Wales


    Reports indicate that the Brits are feeling the pinch in relation to
    recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from
    'Miffed' to 'Peeved'.

    Soon though, security levels may be raised yet again to 'Irritated' or
    even 'A Bit Cross'. Londoners have not been 'A Bit Cross' since 'the
    blitz' in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out.

    Terrorists have been re-categorised from 'Tiresome' to a 'Bloody
    Nuisance'. The last time the British issued a 'Bloody Nuisance'warning
    level was during the great fire of 1666.

    Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its
    terror alert level from 'Run' to 'Hide.' The only two higher levels in
    France are 'Surrender' and 'Collaborate.' The rise was precipitated by a
    recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively
    paralysing the country's military capability.

    It's not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of
    alert. Italy has increased the alert level from 'Shout Loudly and
    Excitedly' to 'Elaborate Military Posturing.' Two more levels remain:
    'Ineffective Combat' Operations' and 'Change Sides.'

    The Germans also increased their alert state from 'Disdainful Arrogance'
    to 'Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.' They also have two higher
    levels: 'Invade a Neighbour' and 'Lose.'

    Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only
    threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

    The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy.
    These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish
    navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

  2. #2

    Join Date
    Mar 2007


    Printed off a copy for the works notice board.
    Who's had the accident!!
    Who called the doctor?

  3. #3
    nobbynobbs Guest


    :lol: :lol:

  4. #4
    Alice Band Guest


    As a former Belgian resident I resemble that remark. And they forgot the chocolates...

    :coffee: *goes back to her cup of spoon melting strength coffee*

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